The Stereotypes of Durham University

University, they say, is full of a vibrant range of people from different cultures and different views on life, but Durham Uni Students has set out to prove ‘they’ wrong, with notes on some of the more common stereotypes found at Durham University.

The Rah

Possibly the best-known of Durham University’s stereotypes, rahs are most commonly found (supposedly) in the bailey colleges. The rah (plural: rahs) can be easily spotted by their love of scarves (for the males) or pashminas (for the females), and messy-looking hair which, on closer inspection, clearly took 3 hours that morning to perfect with a concoction of hair wax and swearing.

Some may hate them; you may learn to love them – Durham Uni Students believes life at Durham University just wouldn’t be Durham University without them…

The Female Rah

Most likely to be hunting for males of their species in Elvet Riverside or buying smoothies in the DSU, the female rah hunts in packs for likely future investment-banker husbands in Klute or on bailey college bar crawls. Visitors to Durham are advised not to feed any female rahs they spot, as they have been known to bite. A tell-tale sign one or more female rahs are in the vicinity is sudden, ear-bursting high-pitched shrieks and a rapid increase in the use of the word darling (pronounced ‘dah-ling’).

The Male Rah

Most likely to be wearing Durham stash and a light pink or blue shirt (all with up-turned collars) and beige trousers, the male rah is most likely to be spotted on a college bar crawl, ‘chinning’ bottles of alco-pops like the ‘poor people’ they seem to despise.

The Anti-Rah

Anti-rahs are generally a quiet bunch, with little to identify them in dress sense or bar-based behaviour (they often, however, tend to emanate from the north). However, the blood of the anti-rah begins to boil when they even see the logo of Jack Wills never mind when they see a group of pale shirts sitting outside the library of an exam period morning!

(Thanks to Simon for this one).

The ‘Wait For Me Until I Decide I’m Not Coming’ Girl

Often a sub-type of rah, the ‘wait for me until I decide I’m not coming’ girl will insist that groups of her friends wait for ‘5 minutes’ (read: hours) for her to apply make-up and (re)dress, only for them to discover that she’s not coming when a search party is sent to observe any progress she’s made to getting ready. Common instances of this occur before going to Hound (POS), Loveshack or Klute, or even on a college bar crawl.

The ‘Call Me By My Old Nickname’ Guy

Most obvious during freshers’ week, the ‘call me by my old nickname’ guy will insist on enforcing their lame or laboured nick name from secondary school becomes their moniker through university life.

Guinness Geeks

Often to be found sitting in the darker, danker corners of their respective college bars, Guinness geeks, often with impressive facial hair growth (as opposed to the nouveau cheveux), devote their lives to the devouring of vast quantities of the slick, black stout, often becoming angry when it is not served with a perfect, creamy-white head (yes, you did read that correctly, filthy people) and in a officially branded Guinness™ pint glass.

The ‘Me First’ Guy/Girl

Most commonly found behind you in the queue at a college bar, in the queue for the toilets, or waiting for a taxi at 3am on the Market Square, the ‘me first’ guy or girl will make it their sole task to destroy the great British tradition that is the orderly queue, forcing their way through the social hierachy of the bar queue to order 20 drinks for themselves and all of those on the same bar crawl as them, ‘kindly’ taking the time to question whether each person they’re ordering drinks for would like ice, a glacier cherry and a cocktail umbrella in the most frustratingly-slow monotone voice possible.

The ‘I’ll Just Get One More’ Girl

Whilst the ‘me first’ exists both in male and female form in approximately equal numbers, the ‘I’ll just get one more’ exists almost uniquely in female form, often asking for ‘just one more’ drink from the bar maid before allowing you to be served, even though you let them in front of you at the bar because you thought they’d only order one drink, not buy enough alcohol to down Conservative minister.

The Party Animal

The party animal exists in every walk of life: you see them partying all night long and yet the next morning they look fine. Whilst frustrating, rest assured their liver probably won’t make it past 40…

The (Facebook) Friend Whore

The Facebook friend whore will add just about everyone in their year/college/network as a friend on the social networking website, Facebook. Possible amusement can come from looking for the drunken or embarrassing photographs, if they’ve forgotten to alter the privacy settings…

The ‘Quirky’ Facebook Profile Picture Guy

More often than not male, the ‘quirky’ Facebook profile picture guy will go out of their way to find the strangest, most bizarre photograph or image of something – anything – in the hope that it’ll allow them to friend-whore on Facebook. Quite frequently, the quirky is also a call me by my old nickname guy.

The Moron In Every Society/Committee/Club

Much like the party animal, the moron in every society/committee/club (MES for short) will join every university and college club or society and run for every position which is offered at college level. Often a sub-type of the moron in every society/committee/club. Whilst it’s great to be involved in something, not even the secret degree worker could possibly do everything the MES has signed up to…

The Roommate Nutcase

Despite what it says in the glossy university handbooks, 99% of people who volunteer to share a room are roommate nutcases. They’ll lie on the forms about their taste in music and time they go to sleep, which means you’ll end up sharing a room for at least a term with someone who not only has very little in common with you, but who actually lied to share a room with you…

The Nouveau Cheveux Guy

Often to be found during freshers’ week, the nouveau cheveux guy (for very few women will have such facial hair) is defined by his newly-found, wispy facial hair, which he meticulously trims at regular intervals. Should a new acquaitance not notice the facial hair instantly, the noveau cheveux will be quick to point out that they have a ‘beard’. This species is often a subtype of arts student or the ‘never shuts up about their gap year’ git.

The ‘Never Shuts Up About Their Gap Year’ Git

Another freshers’ week find, the ‘never shuts up about their gap year’ git will not (shockingly) ever shut up about how many orphans in Africa they saved, how many countries they visited or any other number of inane facts they care to remember. Quite often a sub-type of rah.

Secret Degree Workers

Quite possibly a party animal too, secret degree workers will pretend not to work at all, and stay awake all night to complete work to the highest standard possible whilst assuring their friends they’ve not done it.

The Arts Student

Often a sub-type of rah, the arts student is one you’ll have undoubtedly have seen if you’ve ever been in Popolo. To be found with a paperback novel and a small, mostly empty folder, the arts student will spend most of their university life in the bars and cafés of Durham, ‘studying’.

The Science Student

Generally over-worked, the science student is often to be found in the chemistry café of the university’s science site in a rare break between lectures, practicals and tutorials.

The Manic Medic

Like the science students, medics at Durham University’s Stockton campus are over-worked, and love complaining about it.

Identifiable by the huge bag of medical textbooks they carry around campus and a slight whiff of the dissection labs, medicine students can always be found with caffeine to hand.

Heavy drinkers by all reports, medics will be the first to criticise others for alcohol abuse!

(Thanks to Liam for this one)

Missed Anyone?

If Durham Uni Students has missed any stereotype you think deserves a mention, why not get in touch?

Elsewhere on Durham Uni Students™